1. (Looking at a lawn decoration of Baby Jesus) "Mama, where Jofess?" "Who?" "Jofess! You know, Mary and Jofess!"
2. "Santa gonna sneak in our house and eat da cookies and have a yittle snack...he hungwy. And he take a yittle peak in my woom to make sure I'm sweeping. And Wu-dolf gonna help put da tweats in da shoes!" (He couldn't think of the word "stocking")
3. "Mama? You turn on worship music so I can dwum to da beat?"
4. "I pwayin da guitar for Jesus!" (He totally made this up on his own.)
5. "Ava cwying. I be-er go wescue her! (sets himself up in running position and then runs "as fass as I can!" to her room) 'Don't worry Ava! Ca-web coming! Don't worry, Baby Jayne. I'm here.'"
6. (In the car while Ava's crying) "We almost dare, Ava, don't cwy (cry)."
7. He now asks all questions in the form of a statement (because he thinks he always knows the answer). "We going to Didneywand (Disneyland) today."
8. "It weally windy out here. I be-er put my hands in my pockets so dey don't blow away. Mama? You hold Ava so she don't blow away up in da sky?" (His poor vivid imagination.)
9. (After telling him not to play with the shower curtain so it doesn't fall on us.) "Yeah, it might fall on you. And you might break...into yittle pieces. (using fingers to show how the little pieces would scatter)"
10. (playing the 'air drums') "I pway da bass dwum yike dis (deep) "BOOM BOOM BOOM" And I pway da snare dwum yike dis "boom boom" And I pway da cymbols yike dis "ch! ch! ch!" He cocks his head to the side, looks at me like a teacher and puts hand to his ear and says, "Hear da difference?"